Here are some things I’ve learnt about foxes in London:

1. There are approximately 10,000 foxes roaming London, RIGHT NOW!
2. The average lifespan of a Red Urban fox is 2 years.
3. Given the perils in urban areas, that’s quite a long time.
4. These wily creatures are not afraid of much, including:

Things foxes aren’t really afraid of:

1. A man in his pants with a hosepipe
2. All settings on said hosepipe nozzle, including ‘Jet’
3. Hissing
4. Shouting
5. Staring Contests
6. Our cat
7. My scent in the corners of our garden. (This advice could have been a mate wind up)

The battle has been lost, as well as the war. But at least I fought with valour and pride.

The strange looks I get from familiar faces in the neighbourhood must be quiet recognition. And that light which came on at two in the morning whilst I was building an olfactory perimeter was a great beacon of recognition.

It feels good to be a neighbourhood hero.